Painted, Petrified, and Howdy Pardner

We left the Sleep Inn Lucky Lane, Flagstaff, and were on our way to the Petrified Forest. Decades ago, my grandparents brought a piece of petrified wood back from their cross-country vacation and gave it to my parents. It was colorful, shiny, and hard as a rock. I never understood how wood could turn to stone. Now that I have visited the National Park in Arizona, I understand a little better. I think. Once upon a time there was a flood, but not the one with the Ark. Lots of trees were uprooted and washed downstream and landed in the Petrified Forest National Park. Over eons, alkali got into the cracks, holes, and weak spots of these underwater trees, and solidified them into priceless works of art. It is tempting, while walking along the marked trails of the park, to bend and pick up a little piece of petrified wood to keep as a souvenir. Resist the temptation or you could soon find yourself in handcuffs having a free ride to the Sheriff's office (not necessarily the one with the Saguaro cactus). The Rangers protect the precious petrified wood, and even put out a green form for visitors to complete if they see anyone taking the wood. Bonnie took one of the forms in case we encountered anyone showing criminal tendencies along the rest of our vacation. We traveled the 28 miles through the park, as well as the 3.5 mile loop at Blue Mesa, and stumbled into a dark theatre at the visitor center while the "Timeless Impressions" video was being shown. We got to see most of it without disturbing too many other visitors. Those that want to bring home a legal piece of petrified wood can buy it at shops or the Visitor Center. When you drive out of the Park, the Ranger stops all cars and asks if anyone has taken anything from it. Donald told the man that they picked up a couple of women in the park, indicating Bonnie and me. The nonstop comedy of it all.

It was 87 delightful degrees, another perfect vacation day, and after seeing our fill of petrification, we decided it was time to have lunch at the little diner at the Visitor Center. The menu was basic American fast food fare, and good.

The Painted Desert was beautiful and loaded with photo ops. There was even something called Newspaper Rock, which had petroglyphs, carved by Native Americans, which acted as solar calendars. Not having the key to this ancient puzzle, we could not unlock its secrets, but it was fascinating anyway. The striped rocks were very cool also. I was never

good at Chemistry, and luckily this did not detract from the beauty of the area.

Enough of the desert for us for the day. We were thirsty and hungry and a little tired. We got to Gallup and checked in to the Sleep Inn. There was a

sign at the hotel, "Welcome Rodeo Riders", and some of us silently wondered if there would be galloping up and down the hallways tonight. We then drove around a bit in Gallup to see what was happening. We found the location of the rodeo, and we saw a pawn shop. Bonnie thought it would be fun to visit it. I don't know about the rest of our party, but this was my first pawn shop. Ten minutes was a long enough visit, and the longhorns wouldn't have looked THAT great on the front of the GM.

Golden Corral, here we come! This was where I saw one of my favorite (missed) photo ops of the trip. The restaurant was filled with rodeo riders, male and female, who were relaxing after a busy day in the saddle. Every one of them was cute, and none of them was over 12. I saw a back view of a pint-sized rodeo hero complete with boots, black hat, and big belt buckle, and he was strutting out of the restaurant toward the family truck. Snapping the Grand Canyon and Painted Desert was one thing, but snapping people we don't know is just plain rude. Rodeo seems to be as big in New Mexico for young kids as soccer is at home.

Once darkness fell and we were at the hotel, we heard some fireworks. Bonnie and Clyde heard a few trains overnight, but nothing like Flagstaff two years ago. We watched a little of the Coke Zero Daytona race, and found out the next morning that Tony Stewart won. Happy Fourth of July!

Fourth of July Eve

Day 17, July 3rd, and up early at the Canyon to see the sun rise. How often will that happen in a lifetime? When planning the vacation, getting up at 5:00 am for such a special moment seemed like a splendid idea, and I was all for it. On the morning of the big day, only Bonnie was willing to make the effort, because the rest of us decided sleep was more important. Bonnie surprised a mule deer near the South Rim, and followed it to the car, getting some great photos. Once I got up, the wildlife had moved on, but I got a few shots of the South Rim.

After a fantastic breakfast, same table, different server, we checked out and headed for some more South Rim sights. The mule deer appeared a couple more times during the morning, and we also saw some pack mules on their way to carry heavy loads of the human variety down, down into the Canyon. We stopped at Mather Point, Grand View Point, Desert View and Watchtower. The sky was blue, the clouds pretty and puffy white, and the tourists were few. It was a perfect day. And the Grand Canyon stays still for every single photograph. There wasn't a single blurry photo the whole visit.

We were sorry to say goodbye to the Grand Canyon, but it was getting ever closer to our next meal. Bonnie had found Cameron Trading Post for lunch. Fantastic gift shop, fantastic restaurant, fantastic service. Bonnie and I split a side order of Navajo Fry Bread, which is identical twins with Fried Dough. Only somehow better. The piece the server brought us, accompanied by sugar, cinnamon, and honey, was as large as a dinner plate. The burger I ordered did not come on a bun. It came sandwiched between two more dinner-plate-sized Fry Breads. I did not eat every last bite, but came very close. The beverages were handled by a separate server, and this system worked very well. No one went thirsty. After that fabulous lunch, I waddled out to the gift shop to burn off some calories walking up and down the aisles, occasionally power lifting attractive items. The whole place was part tourist attraction, part local favorite, and I gave it my highest endorsement. Make the effort to stop if you are in the area.

Once we all had our fill of the Trading Post, we headed for the Wapatki Monument, which we repeatedly had trouble pronouncing. The amount of lava in the area is mind boggling, and I was really fascinated by the black lava, which looked as if asphalt had been spread on the hillsides. Occasionally there would be a tiny sprout of green vegetation poking through it. Sorry, I got no photos of the lava either. Wapatki Monument was on a meandering 38 mile desert road, and included pueblo ruins. The highlight was a 100 room pueblo. Unfortunately, a lightning storm cut our visit short.

We reached Flagstaff, our destination for the evening, and checked into the Sleep Inn. We learned the hard way to be careful where to book a room in Flagstaff. Hearing the trains go through, whistles blowing, every hour on the hour all night wasn't so much fun the first time it happened to us, two years ago, although the desk clerk at that particular Quality Inn said she "loved the trains". The Sleep Inn was far enough away so that we would not be sleep-deprived in the morning. We made a visit to a laundromat, named Just Like Home (not), and there Donald won a free wash & dry the next time he returned by answering the question of the week, "What was the first breakfast cereal to be manufactured in the US?" (Shredded Wheat). I committed a landromat faux-pas when I tossed a used dryer sheet into what I thought was a trash barrel but was actually someone's laundry basket. I took it out as soon as I realized, but still got dirty looks. All the other laundromat clients seemed to be related.

After that enjoyable hour, we brought all our newly washed clothes back to our rooms, then went to Cracker Barrel for supper. Comfort food was what I needed. I don't remember what was on my plate, but I'm sure it's still on my hips. Afterward we took a scenic little ride around Flagstaff, for it was July 3rd and things could really get popping later. Clyde cruised us by the Quality Inn we stayed at two years ago, still near the tracks, and the parking lot was full of college students of the male variety. I could only imagine the hi jinks that would go on all night long. If we had booked here the train whistles would have been the least of our problems.

Thank you, Bonnie, for booking us far from the kegging crowd.

London Bridge, the Sheriff, and a Canyon

Day 16's dance card was looking good, and I was excited to get underway. We passed up breakfast at Fresh Market Square, and chose to have McD's in the food court. It felt like dieting. Today when we passed over the Colorado River, Donald changed the time in the GM. We took 95 toward Needles (named for Needle Mountain), heading for the Grand Canyon. But first we had a stop to make, at London Bridge in Lake Havasu City. The city looks brand new. First Italy, and then London - we were really covering ground on this trip. It was 101 degrees as we strolled around and snapped for a while, then we staggered our way back to the car. No matter what some may think, dry heat is HOT.

We made a brief stop at the Sheriff's Office as we exited LHC for a photo op with a cactus. Donald and Clyde said that the Sheriff opened the front door of the Lockup (the lockup???) to see what we were doing, decided we were harmless tourists, and went back inside. Seeing a saguaro cactus was one of the things I had wanted to see, so I could check it off the list. I still hadn't seen a moose, but we had eight more days of chances.

On the next part of our journey, we encountered some T&L storms, and the temperature dropped to 63 degrees, from 101. Bonnie and I nearly needed our blankets. The sky was ominous - heavy, dark, and low - and we drove through a wall of rain. This was the worst weather we had encountered yet. Once the rain lightened a bit, we decided to do something wild & crazy - have lunch at a restaurant NOT on the dance cards. We stopped at Westside Lilo's on Route 66 in Seligman, AZ. It was a nice find, full of locals, and our server brought us the biggest glasses of soda that I have ever seen. The french fries that came with our sandwiches covered half the plate, and were so good that it was hard to stop eating. Route 66 is the original land for kicks.

Our next stop would be the Grand Canyon. We fueled the GM at the Chevron near the park entrance, then entered through the park gates at no charge, thanks to the National Park Access card. Age has its privilege. We saw signs announcing a controlled burn and requests for no phone calls about it. We could smell smoke and saw some burned areas.

El Tovar, our lodging for the night, was beautiful. It is smaller than Old faithful Inn, has no elevator, but has gorgeous carpeting, furnishings, and windows. It was charming. Our room, #6480, was right at the top of the stairs, and we gathered up the luggage and a very kind staffer carried it all up for us. What a pleasant surprise. Our room view was of the roof and also of the GRAND CANYON. There were no ghosts or even rumors of ghosts. There was just the hush of the Grand Canyon, with the voices of other equally awestruck visitors.

We decided to go out for a little mobile sight-seeing until our dinner reservations, at 6:30. We had been having trouble with the time all day, because parts of Arizona don't keep the same time as other parts. We forgot to ask the desk clerk when we checked in, but as we were driving around checking out the other lodges, we saw a young Ranger ticketing illegally parked cars. We pulled over to speak with him, and Donald, who was supposed to ask the time, instead asked what time the Park closed. The Ranger thought Donald said "path" and we realized the Massachusetts' accent wasn't working. The upshot was that the Park never closes, and the Ranger said we can go out and party all night (especially funny considering his audience) and then return any time. I asked the Ranger if it was 4:20, because that's what my watch said. Funnily enough, it was.

Dinner in the El Tovar dining room, where we had window seats at table #11, was pricey but excellent. Our server hustled with the speed of a tortoise, although he had a pleasant personality.

The gift shops in the hotel and the nearby stone building offered much in the way of souvenirs. The views of the Grand Canyon were spectacular, and changed from minute to minute. It would have been easy to sit for hours and just watch the show. We stayed outside and walked and snapped until we got tired and cold. There was a TV at El Tovar, so we could catch up on the news of the world and the weather for tomorrow. Hot and sunny, probably.

We had trouble deciding which we enjoyed more, the Old Faithful Inn or El Tovar.

Buffet Addicts Anonymous

24 more hours in Vegas, and we would make the most of it, in our own little ways. First stop was the buffet, where we purchased our meal tickets for the day and settled in for our first meal. The food was varied, the selection enormous, the flavors unsurpassed. Donald, not usually a buffet aficionado, said it was the best food of the vacation. After breakfast, we strolled off to the pool area, having left our rooms suitably attired for a swim. We spent a relaxing few hours under the trees but in the sun. Later, at the slots, where I had given myself a gambling allowance, I am ashamed to say that I got gambling fever and just knew that the next one would be the BIG ONE. I went far over my allowance, and was finally able to break myself away, but not until I had lost a whopping $31.

We took a Vegas road trip and visited the Venetian for a taste of Italy. It was lovely, and the closest to Italy I have been since visiting the Italy pavilion at EPCOT. Then the day was a round of eating, resting, shopping, gambling, until it was time to get ready for the 7:00 showing of Ka. Donald and I had previously seen Mystere and La Nouba, and looked forward to this show with anticipation. On line it had looked amazing, and I wondered how a sandstorm was going to be represented on the stage. (With lots and lots of cork, I later learned.) Ka was interesting, but I think it lacked the incredible athleticism of the previous two, and became my third favorite Cirque show.

At 3:30ish am, we, and probably many others on the fourth floor of MGM, were awakened by running bare feet in the corridor - lots of it - and female shouts of, "Run, Lisa, Run!" None of us felt like leaping out of bed to look through the peephole or to call the front desk to report it. There was much speculation between Donald and Clyde for the next few days about what Lisa and friends might have been doing. And wearing. What happened in Vegas stayed in Vegas.

July 1st and Day 15, and Laughlin, here we come. We stopped at Sam's Town Casino for the Buffalo Stampede and Fountain show, shooting eight stories into the air while the waters dance in the lights to a symphonic score recorded by the Indianapolis Philharmonic Orchestra. We were ready for some CULTURE. Sam's Town also sponsors a NASCAR Nationwide race, the Sam's Town 300. We walked in, eager to see the show, and we asked several staff members about its location. Maybe they were new because they didn't know what we were talking about. That wasn't a good sign. Once we found the woman who knew about the show, she gave us the news that the 10:00 show had been cancelled. Waiting around in the casino with the three other patrons currently there didn't appeal, so we left after photographing some splendidly fake-looking wildlife in their fake-looking habitats.

It was 103 degrees when we got back in the car at 9:30. Nice! We passed through Henderson and Boulder City, and cruised onto 95S to Laughlin. Out in the desert, and there was lots and lots of desert, we saw giant solar panels, sheets of them. Clean alternate energy sources are always interesting, like a science project that somebody else made. Once on 163E, we were watching for the Sacred Mountains, which we knew were on the road approaching Laughlin. We were unsuccessful, but we did see many red cacti on the desert hillsides.

We got to Harrah's early, around 11:00, and our rooms were not ready for us. No matter, we needed gas, so off we went across the Colorado River into Arizona and a different time zone. I guess a river is as good a state line divider as anything. We checked mileage, as usual, with the fill ups, and it was one of our lowest at 18.84 mpg. That's Vegas, baby.

Back at Harrah's we had a nice (buffet) lunch at Fresh Market Square, then we all got Player Cards so we would be eligible for the 5:00 drawing for $100. We spent the afternoon at the slots, walking around the hotel, and just hanging. We did not win the $100 or even the second or third prizes. We consoled ourselves by visiting the pool area, the beach, and the river side. And with supper at the buffet.

Bakersfield to (Texas de) Brasil

It's Day 13 and we're headed for Vegas after a hot breakfast at the Clarion. There were some stunning bordello-type faux crystal chandeliers leading to the breakfast room, which was under construction at the time of our visit. We weren't sure if the chandeliers were the before or after.

At 5:54 am it was already 83 degrees - woohoo. We had reached 116 yesterday, and we wondered if today would top that. At home it was still rainy and in the 50s and we all appreciated the excellent weather that had been sent our way. Donald had the complimentary USA Today from the hotel, and announced that Billy Mays, pitchman, had died after bumping his head during a rough landing.

We passed what looked like thousands of windmills in the Tehapatche Mountains in CA, and thought with regret of the resistance to this source of power back home. The temperature dropped 20 degrees in less than an hour in the mountains. We spotted some mountain goats so far in the distance that they were just white specks. In California City, out in the desert, there was an airport with a small control tower but really big planes. It was close to Edwards Air Force Base. Hmmm... Also in the paper was an obituary for Gale Storm; that made two celebs. We hoped there would not be another. The papers and TV news were filled with Michael Jackson.

Along Route 15N toward Nevada, we were treated to signs with the Ten Commandments. Fortunately none of them is about overeating. That is covered by the Deadly Sins, but no one had thought to put up signs for those.

While driving through the desert with overcast skies above, our good weather luck faltered. We passed through three different storms; the second, and worst, had 48 drops of rain. There was a sign for a town in California called Zzyzx. What imagination some people have! Once the sun came out, the GM said it was 100 degrees. We then drove by the World's Largest Thermometer in Baker, which said it was 96 degrees. Which one do we believe? Then we saw some fantastic advice on a sign not far from Death Valley, "Avoid Overheating - Turn A/C off Next 16 Miles". Sure we will!

We reached Nevada at 9:50, and immediately exited for a casino, the Primm Valley Resort & Casino. It wasn't to gamble, it was to see Bonnie & Clyde's car, bullet holes and all. The car attracted quite a few tourists, and no photography was allowed. Yes, it was morbid, and we did not stay long. We had a buffet to visit, and were in time to catch the breakfast price. Changeover time at buffets is a very special time because there are foods from two different meals and you are charged the lower price. We dined and geared up for our upcoming Vegas visit.

Happy, full, and anticipating staying at the MGM Grand for only $50/night with a $35 meal credit thrown in, we arrived not long after leaving Primm. We had a detailed plan in place. Bonnie and I would leap out of the car at the front door, run in to register, and then hurry to the Concierge to buy tickets for the Cirque de Soleil Ka show for the next night. Clyde and Donald would take the GM to the nearest Terrible's for an oil change, as the check engine light had come on after 3,000 miles. It's important to treat a rental with the same respect as one's own, especially when driving exorbitant distances. Yes, we would be reimbursed. Once the oil change was done, the men would take all the luggage and meet us in the lobby. Sounds easy enough, unless the hotel is the size of two football fields, which I think MGM is. Maybe three football fields. With a gigantic parking garage, which is where Clyde & Donald were when the called us. After half an hour of, "Can you hear me now?" and "Where are you?" and "WHAT??? I can't hear you!", we finally hooked up in the garage. We all rolled our way to the fourth floor, with the help of the elevator, while Bonnie and I told the men that procrastination pays because we got the Cirque tickets for half-price.

Our rooms were fantastic, and we had B&W photos of Sophia Loren and Tyrone Power in ours. MGM didn't stint on star photos, and they had even put them in every bathroom stall of every restroom. After a brief stop in the rooms, we looked around the hotel a bit, locating the pool and restaurant of choice (the buffet, naturally), and saw a sign that nearly brought tears to my eyes - dine all day at the buffet for $29.99/pp. But that was for tomorrow.

Bonnie had made dinner reservations for us for that night months ago. We had both used multiple email accounts with multiple anniversaries and multiple birthdays to join the Texas de Brasil eclub to receive coupons. Since dinner is $50/pp, we needed all the help we could get. We didn't get the email until we were half-way across the country, and were fortunate enough to find a Choice Hotel that had a printer available to guests. The coupon said only one coupon per table could be used. At the restaurant, we explained that we both had coupons for our anniversaries, and could we sit together? No we could not. Could we sit near each other? That was allowed. We had already had one buffet meal that day, but we gamely accepted this new challenge. I enjoyed the side dishes as much, and maybe more than, the parade of beef and chicken that made it to our table. We had never seen anything like it.

We rolled our way out of Texas de Brasil and back to the MGM, where Bonnie and Clyde decided to try their luck. Donald and I felt like dead ducks, so we decided to turn in. After all, it was 8:45. Tomorrow would be another long day of eating, and I wanted to be rested and ready.